Response to Opinion of 88 Greenwich AKA the Douchebag Dormitory

September 30, 2008 at 11:23 pm (88Greenwich, Buttonwood Real Estate, douche, Douche Of The Day, Douchebag Dormitory, Greenwich Club Residences, New York, Wall Street) (, , , , , )

I found this review of the Douchebag Dormitory AKA 88 Greenwich Street AKA Greenwich Club Residences today:

Lots of potential, mediocre execution
From: -Anonymous-
Date posted: 9/6/2008
Years at this apartment: 2008 – 2008

I recently moved into a large 1 bedroom unit at 88 Greenwich, and I have some reservations about the decision.

At first blush, the building seemed like exactly what I wanted; a condo building with good amenities and top quality furnishings. And while the building amenities are indeed very impressive (the common areas are beautiful and the staff is very friendly), and the apartments have Viking/Subzero appliances, there are some things that bring the experience down for me.

For one thing, I’ve discovered that while this building is indeed a condo development, most of the units are studios or small one bedrooms, which are used as rentals. This inevitably attracts a set of people which are not what you’d expect from an upscale building (college kids, first year i-bank associates, frat boys doing shares), and this hurts the image greatly. There are also a few apartments used as model dorms, and while that provides great eye candy on occasion, the girls are usually loud and obnoxious european children with little or no consideration for the other residents.

On the weekend evenings, the harbor room (main common area) is usually packed with immature fratty kids drinking cans of PBR and being generally obnoxious. Not the upscale scene described by the real estate people.

There also seems to be an inordinate number of europeans in general, which is fine, except they all seem to absolutely refuse to speak english in the common areas. It is beyond rude and extremely antisocial.

Overall, I’m happy with my apartment, but wish the building was not populated as it seems to be. Unfortunately, it seems to be in danger of becoming a more upscale 2 Gold Street, which should be something that the owners and management company should be very, very concerned about.

The stereotyping of all “college kids, first year i-bank associates, frat boys doing shares” is too simplistic, although most certainly true in most cases.  I’ve also encountered some bitchy passive aggressive trophy wives, their douchey Wall Street middle management husbands, and “the stroller mafia” of young parents who let their kids loose in common areas and park their strollers filled with their crying Aryan spawn in the middle of common area hallways, so don’t just blame the kids!

If you care that much about an exclusive high end atmosphere, perhaps some posh co-op would have suited you better.  Or move to a gated community in the the fucking suburbs and buy a gun.

And what’s the reviewer’s thing against Europeans?  Why should people not speak their own language if they aren’t talking to YOU?  Stupid ignorant American, why don’t you go learn another language.  I suggest Chinese, since they own your asses already.  Or how about Spanish?  That way you can beg for mercy when America’s Hispanic working class revolts and has your white ass against the wall.  That will be the true Reconquista of AmeriKKKa.

Can’t wait for the upcoming economic apocalypse. Maybe that will cut down on the Wall Street douchebaggery in NY and signal the return of knife-wielding tranning hookers to cut yo’ faces.

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